Loneliness

Lonely/Loneliness- sadness because one has no friends or company; isolation.

Did you know the enemy (Satan) loves to attack our mind? Once our mind is in confusion the body follows. So, what happens when we become lonely? Being lonely is an isolation of the mind. God says, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him” (Genesis 2:18). God knows the importance of having a godly companion and/or godly community, we’re created with a longing to not be alone. Being a Christian and lonely is a topic that isn’t discussed enough. It’s seen as we’re Christians and since we know God that equates to not suffering from those feelings (LIES) however, many of us do. Being a Christian doesn’t exempt you from human emotions, desires, etc. but it means we know God is right with us along the way.

Loneliness is something I’ve struggled with for as long as I can remember. I could be surrounded by people all day and have all the friends in the world but still felt lonely. I know God but still felt a deep sense of loneliness. The moment I was abused my mind went into isolation and it was a constant replay of my words don’t matter, so keep my mouth shut which led to a downward spiral of deep mental isolation. Your loneliness may not stem from an incident like mine, but it stems from somewhere. In the world’s eyes, loneliness can be cured by taking drugs, having friendships, romantic relationships, sex, and the list goes on. Some of these may seem innocent but these are all temporary satisfaction. So, what happens when you still feel empty? Thankfully, we have a loving God who not only fills are loneliness BUT He fills it permanently! Last week during my devotion and a deep talk with a friend, I finally got a deep revelation about this on and off loneliness I carried.

 How to get through loneliness

  • God is the only one who can permanently cure that deep loneliness you feel, but you must cling to Him and His word. During my times of loneliness, I held onto my broken understanding for fulfillment or other temporary satisfaction. Guess what happened when they didn’t satisfy me? I still felt lonely. However, when the deep loneliness started to arise again, I did something different. I allowed myself to acknowledge what I felt and repeatedly told myself I’m not alone! I wasn’t alone during my abuse and I’m not alone now. God wants to fill the hollow space in your heart were loneliness resides, so let Him! “I am with you now, I will protect you everywhere you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done everything that I have promised you.” (Genesis 28:15)
  • God wants us to have people in this life who we can depend on when we go through low moments and high moments. He knows the importance of relationships (ones that are healthy and godly). Do you have a godly community? If not ask God for discernment and seek a community but also learn how to be a friend. If you already have godly community great but maybe you have a hard time depending on others. Personally, I’ve always felt I had to carry myself by myself because that’s what I’ve always done, but that’s not entirely true nor is it wise! Look what God says in Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, “Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.” Summary, it is foolish to have a godly community and not lean on them! God wants you to lean on the godly people He already placed or will place in your life, so don’t be afraid.
  • There’s a season for everything and God calls us into seasons of isolation, so we can depend solely on Him and to protect us and prune us for the season ahead. Maybe you’re in that season now but be content and find joy in it. One of my favorite songs is Never Be Alone by Mainstream Worship and my favorite lyrics are “I can never escape from your presence, darkness and light you’re there. Nothing can hide me from your love, I’ll never be alone.” Accept the past and enjoy your current season even if it feels lonely BUT remember you’re never alone in this life!

God loves you more than you know

I love you and remember you’re Chosen, Bianca Brown

Hope beyond Depression and Suicidal Thoughts

I woke up December 19, 2018 and suicide was on my heart. I didn’t want to commit suicide that morning, but the thoughts of a church member whose loved one chose to take their life was on my mind. The thought of a young person taking their life at my University at the start of winter break crossed my mind. It saddens me that one believes they aren’t relevant enough on this earth, so they think why not just leave? Nobody would notice if I’m gone? Nobody would miss me that much or even at all? It would be easier if I wasn’t here? It breaks my heart that one may feel this way, but I understand because I once asked myself those same questions.

I was very skeptical to write this article because I don’t want to offend anyone who is battling these thoughts or may have lost a loved one to suicide. However, I write this as someone who had those thoughts but I’m here to tell you, that you can be an overcomer. Before I get into my personal story. I want to tell you that there is only One supernatural being that can help you tackle these thoughts and surpass them and in turn, you will live free of mental bondage. That being is God our Father. He chose you, as stated in 1 Peter 2:9-10 (MSG). You’re not here by accident but because He chose you and wants YOU to continue living a joyful life and abundant life.

Thoughts of suicide for me started at an early age of about 9 or 10. I used to think nobody is really hearing me and why can’t my loved ones see that something is going on with me. Why am I even here? There was a time I had a cord in my hand and thought if I tighten it around my neck, I would be better off. Kids at school are mean sometimes and nobody REALLY likes me anyway. I should just take myself out. Of course, those are lies! Whisper of lies of the enemy(devil) that played in my mind. John 10:10 tells us that “the thief comes to steal and kill and destroy”, don’t give the enemy what he wants, you’re too precious. BUT the other part of that scripture also says what Jesus has come to do “I have come that they may have life and have it to the full”. See friends God wants you to live and to the fullest! I decided I wanted to live, and I dealt with the thoughts the best way 9/10-year-old me knew how to, ignore them. As I turned 14 some of those thoughts came back, I began to cut myself on my wrist because I was honestly depressed. To add to that I started to remember suppressing thoughts about child molestation and I couldn’t take it. I thought well it’s easier to harm myself than others, so I’ll do that. Eventually, I stopped because I saw how a friend noticed my arm and I was embarrassed. Was I happy with my life? No, but a small part of me knew I had a little bit of purpose being here, so I didn’t end my life or continue to harm myself.

So here I am today, beginning to walk in my God-given purpose and joyful. I’m praying this article can touch someone who may be battling these thoughts from the enemy. You may think my story isn’t that rough and you have it worse than me and that’s okay. Either way, you’re loved and have a purpose. God has a plan for you! Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future”. He has a future for you and he wants YOU and created you to make a difference on this earth. Reach out to a trusted loved one if you’re struggling and most importantly choose to cry out to God and tell him how you feel. I promise he wants to talk to you, “Pile your troubles on God’s shoulders – he’ll carry your load, he’ll help you out. He’ll never let good people topple into ruin” Psalms 55:22(MSG). Life isn’t easy, but I promise living is SO worth it. Life is a choice and I pray your choice is to live and live abundantly!

God loves you more than you know

I love you and remember you’re chosen, Bianca Brown